The Importance of Sex in Marriage

02:38

This post is dedicated to those married women out there who lost the intimacy with their husband because of their kids or career. 

Before, Mau was the sweetest and the most caring person I've ever met on Earth. Lagi pa yan may love letter kahit mag-asawa na kami. Kilig na kilig naman ang lola niyo. Always kami magkayakap, magkadikit and feel ko talaga na ako ang pinaka-importanteng tao sa buhay niya. At fyi mga ateng, winner na winner ang aming sex life that time. Pwede kami magjoin sa Olympics! Lol. Yung tipong magkadikit lang kami eh magbabaga na agad-agad ang aming mga katawan. We even did it in every part of the house anytime we wanted! *Perks of being nakabukod from loved ones! Yey!* Ninamnam namin ng husto this sacred gift of marriage. Walang limit. Gow lang ng gow. Sarap! :D

And then ZZ was born.

She instantly became our main source of happiness. Sa kanya napunta ang attention namin. Baliw na baliw kami sa bagets to the highest level. Eventually, na-set aside yung marriage namin because of her. You can't blame us though. First born eh, taon din pati ang hinintay namin para mabuo siya not to mention na complicated din ang pregnancy ko with her kaya talagang binigay namin ang lahat sa kanya as soon as we had our first glimpse to her. It also didn't help that Mau's always feel pressured and stressed at work kaya pagdating sa bahay he would just spend time with ZZ para gumaan ang pakiramdam niya, would kiss us good night, say I love you and then matutulog na siya. That was his routine 95% of the time. Eventually, nawala ang intimacy between me and my husband. I realized what was happening when I started to see the changes in how we treat each other. Madali na kami mapikon sa isa't isa. Konting kibot, away. Ang lolo niyo nakikisabay na ng bungangaan sa akin. Hindi na siya ganun ka-caring when it comes to me. Hindi na kami masyadong naglalambingan. Literal na umikot ang buhay namin kay ZZ that we even survived weeks and weeks without having sex! Very wrong. I remember telling all these things to a friend. She told me to fix it right away before it's too late. Sex is one of the foundations of a strong marriage daw. Just like love, trust, respect and loyalty, isa daw ang sex sa hindi pwedeng balewalain in marriage. It could lead daw to major problem and more likely to end up being separated. Umalma ako. I told her na hindi kami maghihiwalay because we love ZZ too much. Sabi niya madaming mag-asawa nakulangan sa isa't isa, naghiwalay, nagkaroon ng kanya-kanyang love life pero okay pa din ang setup when it comes to their kids. Okay lang daw ba sa akin yun? Of course not. I never ever ever want to lose Mau. Honestly even if there are times na iniisip kong maghihiwalay kami dahil nakukulangan ako sa attention at lambing niya, ang puso ko para na agad sinusugatan. =(

Anyway, maloka-loka ako when I've realized that my friend was actually right so I talked to Mau about it. Ayaw pa ako pakinggan nung una pero eventually he realized na may point naman talaga si friend. No comment siya about it but he shows it through his actions instead. Bumawi ang lolo niyo. Unti-unti namin binalik ang intimacy. Pareho kaming nag-effort. If he asks for it, kahit wala ako sa mood, gow lang because I swear to myself na hindi ko na siya pagdadamutan ng langit ever. He does the same thing to me. Lakompake kung pagod ka, loving-loving tayo! Ganun ang peg. Lol. But seriously speaking hindi naman totally bumalik yung katulad ng dati but at least hindi na pwede sa amin yung walang kembot in a week lalo na if my special occassion, ay mga ateng! Bigay todo yan lalo na kapag wedding anniversary!

So why I am telling you all these?

Because my friend is absolutely right! It's not just about love, trust, respect and loyalty. We're married couples for crying out loud! Gift yan for us! Hindi na bawal o immoral ang makipag-sex sa partner natin kahit anong positions pa ang gusto natin! We have all the rights now to get naked and have fun on the bed with our spouse! Sulitin natin hanggat kaya pa nating gumiling. Let's not wait for the time na pagsisihan natin dahil masyado tayong naging kampante sa partner natin na kahit wala yun eh okay lang. It's not okay. And it will never be okay. 

Mga bruha, do not ever ever ever let go of your sexual intimacy with your husband just because you have kids already. Or busy sa negosyo o kung ano mang pagpapayaman. It's not really good and I am talking here based on my experience. Do not ever forget that after God, our spouse is our next priority. Also remember that a strong and long lasting marriage relies on the couple and not with the kids. Kahit gaano niyo pa kamahal ang mga anak niyo, if dumating sa point na napabayaan niyo ang marriage niyo most probably you will still end up with a broken family. We don't like that, don't we? Regular love-making is definitely one of those things that can help our marriage lasts forever. I am not saying that you do it everyday ha. Basta bigyan niyo lang ng time each other for some sexy time. Kung kailangan na kayo ang mag-effort, gow! Sa banda dun si hubby niyo na mismo ang kakalabit sa inyo. So for those who do not have kids yet, alam niyo na ha? And para naman sa mga tulad namin ni Mau na baliw much sa anak, let's do this. Keep in mind na si hubby ang priority and ikaw din dapat ang priority niya. Let's keep the fire burning!!! 

Mag-interview ako ng mga friends ko next time na nakaexperience din ng ganito and tried to revive their sexual life. I'll ask them for tips on what they did to make their hubby go crazy on bed tapos share ko sa inyo. Basta ako? We may not be able to do it everyday lalo na ngayon na diet na naman kami because of my pregnancy but I'm telling you, everytime we do it, my husband makes sure I am fully satisfied! Pak!!! =)

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6 comments

  1. My favorite blog post of yours so far.... Hahahahahaha!! Totoo yan sinabi ng friend mo. Ingredient din ng stronger marriage kapag sexually active kayo kaya always make sure that you have time to make love with your husband. Kami nga nanonood pa ng porn minsan to check other positions na hindi pa namin nagagawa hahahahaha! Just to spice up our sex life you know!! :)

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    1. Care to share the positions? Baka di pa namin nagagawa. Lol :P

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  2. Pak na pak!! Hahahaha!! Kami hanyan ngayon, puro sa baby. Sex is rushed and we hide like we're doing something wrong hahaha!! Nagmamadali kami baka manghingi na ng milk si baby. Hahy! Kailangan pa talaga ng more more effort. Pero at least kiss and hug meron naman everyday. Kahit yun man lang haha

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    1. Wow! Very good kayo, muther! Tama yan. Naiinggit ako bigla. Kami waley talaga after ko manganak kahit sabi ni doc eh keri na. Pero hindi na ako papayag ng ganun ngayon. Hahaha! Pagkagaling ng tahi awra na agad-agad! Lol

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  3. Imagine the tricks we do to make love while the kids are asleep or AWAKE. Haha! Nice blog beh

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    1. I'd like to know the tricks! :D

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